Sunshine on my shoulder
“I knew that if I allowed fear to overtake me, my journey was doomed. Fear, to a great extent, is born of a story we tell ourselves, and so I chose to tell myself a different story from the one women are told. I decided I was safe. I was strong. I was brave. Nothing could vanquish me.” – Cheryl Strayed, Wild.
Over the past couple of months, I have had good days and bad ones. There have been days when I’ve been so exhausted and in so much pain that even lifting a finger hurt. I feel like sometimes it’s a cycle… one that starts off with physical pain and leads to mental and emotional pain.
Sometimes it felt like it took everything I’ve had to push past it… a minute to minute battle with myself. I got through it knowing that even though I was fighting a long drawn out, draining battle… it was one that was worth the fight.
I discussed my mother's illness in a previous blog. After being diagnosed with the tumor, we decided to move to NRS. I wanted to see the endrochrin specialist there. But since it is Saturday, it is outdoors, so the doctor does not have much time. the intern takes care of you ,
So we were shown in Ranaghat. The doctor saw that there was no tumor, this pain is in the breast during menopause.👧💜💝😊
It’s important to remember that we’re allowed to have those bad days. Forcing yourself to be happy and cheerful all the time serves no purpose. Who are we being fake and putting on an act for?
I allowed myself to cry, to feel the pain, to indulge in self-pity… for a short while. Only you know what you’re going through and it is fine to accept it. Emotions aren’t wrong. Feeling negative emotions isn’t wrong. But after a point, identify it, recognize it and refuse to let it control your life.
And so… with the little experience I have had, I urge you all to take the time to understand it. It requires you to study it, find out what works for you and to be diligent about your treatment. It requires days of strongly believing in oneself, of knowing that tomorrow will be better than today. It is not a fight against negative thoughts. It's taking a stand to not give in, no matter what. Most importantly, it is about living every day, and not just surviving.
previous blog :
https://aishwaryakarmakar19.blogspot.com/2022/03/switch-on-sunshine.html
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